SoulStirred: Stories of Growth And The Human Experience

Emily Garcia (00:03)
Welcome lovely listeners to SoulStirred Stories of Growth and the Human Experience. I'm Emily Garcia. And I'm Kasey Clark. We will be your guides on this journey. We are so glad you are here. Each week, we'll come together, sometimes with other incredible thinkers, creators, and adventurers, to generously share stories of self-discovery, recovery, triumph, and what it means to live a life on purpose. No matter where you are in your own journey,

connection is here for you at SoulStirred Settle in, take a deep breath in, and let's inspire each other. Welcome to SoulStirred

Emily (00:48)
Welcome back, Soulstered listeners. We're grateful you are here with us today. And actually, speaking of gratitude, we want to remind you that we're hosting a 66-day gratitude challenge. That is the amount of time on average it takes to form a habit. And we want to help you form a habit of gratitude that will help you with your own

physical health, your emotional health, and your relationships because there is research that shows that gratitude helps all of those things. So you can sign up for free to join the challenge at tribemindbody.com forward slash gratitude.

And we would like to thank Cristina Schutz and Suzanne Mitchell, who are two of our listeners who are participating in the challenge and have done a little bit of an extra activity. And thank you to all of our participants. Today, we are excited to be here with Heather Pridemore. Heather is a remarkable leader and visionary in the realms of professional development and creative exploration. As the CEO,

founder and coach at Pride More Coaching, Heather has dedicated herself to empowering first generation and rising professionals, guiding them toward achieving personalized career success. Her unique approach combines over a decade of corporate experience with deep expertise in leadership and communication, positioning her as a sought after mentor for those aspiring to elevate their careers. Heather recently acquired ArtSpark,

Creative Studio, where her commitment to creativity and innovation shine. This venture highlights her ability to merge artistic vision with strategic business insights. With a background spanning arts nonprofits, the automotive industry, and technology sectors, Heather brings a wealth of experience and a versatile perspective to her endeavors, driving change and fostering growth across various industries.

as an engaging speaker and the host and producer of the amazing podcast, Small Acts of Rebellion, Heather inspires her audience to challenge the shoulds of corporate culture, advocating for a life led with authenticity and aligned with personal values. Welcome Heather.

Kasey (03:12)
We're so excited to have you with us today.

Heather Pridemore (03:15)
I'm so happy to be here. Thank you so much.

Kasey (03:15)
Emily just shared, yeah, where Emily just shared your professional background and I'm just bursting with curiosity to learn like how did you become all of those things? Tell us a little bit about you and your backstory.

Heather Pridemore (03:30)
Yeah, I mean, by accident, I mean, honestly, you know, we all like to imagine that we go through our lives and our careers and we have a plan and we stick to the path and everything goes the way it's supposed to. And I mean, things rarely work that way. I think part of my background coming from so many different types of work also comes from the fact that I've always been open to the opportunity. So it's like,

Kasey (03:34)
Thanks for watching!

Heather Pridemore (04:00)
you know, I'm moving through different jobs or different roles, I'm always sort of open to what maybe is going to come next. And so I wouldn't call it a plan, but more just being open to the possibility. And then I would say that in all of those roles, the thing that's consistent is transferable skills. So while I may have my early career in the nonprofit space and the art world, and that carried me into museum work,

and then eventually into automotive and then into technology, there's connection points all along the way. And so just as an example, I have a master's degree in photographic preservation and collections management. When you think about collections management, that's all about the organization of ideas and objects. And when you think about the work I did in the automotive industry, I was managing business development for a dealer group and

That's all about the organization of people. And so when you think about the parallels and those transferable skills, even though the path seems nonlinear, even though it seems not connected, it very much is.

Kasey (05:11)
Yeah, I can definitely see how all of those things relate. And you're a connector like me, where you see the parts, and then you're able to imagine how they want to fit together. Yeah, cool. So tell us about the parts. Yeah.

Heather Pridemore (05:22)
Identifying, oh I'm sorry Casey, identifying patterns is probably one of my superpowers.

Kasey (05:28)
Yeah, yeah, I can relate. And it's a hard thing, right? When you're the one that can see how things are trying to fit together before others can to feed it back to them in a way that makes them trust what you know to be true for sure. Yeah, I feel you. I feel you. Cool. So tell us about the part that is you. How do you fit into how all of those other pieces fell into place for you?

Heather Pridemore (05:42)
Right, right.

Oh gosh, that's a much harder question to answer. Um, I, uh, I, right. Right. Yeah. So, I mean, I think there are parts of my story that are very deeply me. And so when I think about my early career in art and nonprofits, that really resonated and was very aligned with my value system.

Kasey (05:57)
Welcome to Solstead.

Heather Pridemore (06:18)
And I think my corporate career, well, it's been great to me. And there's so many things about it. I liked, and there are definitely some really high highs within that part of my story. There were aspects of that career that really asked me to set aside parts of myself. And I wasn't always doing work or feeling in alignment with my values and certain roles and responsibilities, you know, certain.

cultures and so over the course of my career, there have been parts of me that have been more whole and there have been moments where I was so disconnected that I got to a pretty low place. I mean, my corporate career ended with some pretty severe burnout and coming through the other side of that, I realized that it was important for me to find.

a connection with my personal self in my work and to find that alignment again. And so that's when I decided to start my coaching practice. And then with this recent acquisition of ArtSpark, it's really coming full circle because now I can take all of that art background that I had in the early part of my career and I can combine it with all the business acumen I've developed over the past decade plus in the corporate space. And I can do it in a way where

I'm making the choices. Someone asked me recently about doing so much stuff and I said, I do more now, but the difference between now and before is that there's a freedom to all the things that I do. And so while I'm much busier in a way now, I'm also much more in alignment with my values and that makes a big difference.

Emily (08:09)
Oh, I feel you. It is. It's such an interesting thing, owning your own business, because you you're on. I mean, if something has to get done, you're going to do it. And it's not like a 40 hour a week job, but you show up and you do it. But when you're in, you are living within your values and loving what you get to do. It doesn't feel like, oh, I have to go do this thing. It really does feel like I'm doing this thing that has a bigger purpose.

You said something when you started off about being open to the possibilities, that you've learned to be open to possibilities. And I'm wondering if you could expand on that. How did you learn to be open to possibilities?

Heather Pridemore (08:51)
I think it comes from what Casey and I were talking about earlier, that pattern, that ability to notice patterns. And so as I've moved through my life, through my career, and I've noticed these patterns, often that curiosity, that willingness to ask questions, to explore, to understand.

I think that's a really probably important aspect too. I'm a big fan of continuous learning and so I'm sort of always asking questions and exploring and I do sometimes learn about things just for the sake of curiosity. So I think that all lends itself well to being open. And I mean sometimes things happen to you. I mean when I started in automotive, I took the job because we had just relocated.

And at the time my husband was like, oh, don't rush, you know, finding a job. You can wait till you find something in your industry, which was still nonprofits at the time. And I thought, no, I'll just go ahead and take this job that someone told me is available, start making some money. We'll get settled here and I'll be here six months. Maybe I was there six and a half years, but along the way I was.

Emily (10:01)
Wow.

Kasey (10:01)
Wow.

Heather Pridemore (10:04)
advocating for myself through that process. And so this entry level job I took, basically scheduling service appointments, turned into running all of business development for both sales and service. And eventually taking over all of the marketing and negotiating with all the vendors and managing our brand image and our brand voice and overseeing our events. And so I was wearing a lot of hats and that really...

spoke to the work I had done in the nonprofit space, because when you're in nonprofits, there's not a lot of money, people wear a lot of hats. And so I brought some of that scrappiness to a corporate environment and was able to wear a lot of hats and sort of, you know, feed myself in ways that were maybe more in alignment with what I wanted to be doing, even though I was in a industry that I had not expected.

Emily (10:57)
Wow.

Kasey (10:57)
Wow. I hear a person who knows how to create from everything and create from nothing. Right? It's like, here I am in this situation. Maybe I was led here not by my passion or my dreams as much, but I can find what's here for me and make something of it all that works for me and that suits me, that fuels me in some way. I, too, I see so much of myself in you, Heather.

I call myself a possibilityist and there are there are some challenges around being a possibility abilityist right like decisions are hard for me sometimes because as soon as you decide you shut down the possibilities choices can be overwhelming because I can see how they're all partially right and yet it is also this gift where anything that happens to me or around me

becomes an invitation to create, including the bad things. It's like, oh, I got this parking ticket. Damn it. I wonder what the universe wants with me with this thing. So I just have a lot of respect for people like you and me, who can live that way and create a little bit from everything.

Emily (12:05)
Thank you.

Kasey (12:12)
You said something else in your opening that I'm curious about. You said that early in your career, before you created your own business and kind of carved out your niche in the industry, you noticed having to set aside parts of yourself.

Can you say more about that or give us a story that would tell us what that was like for you?

Heather Pridemore (12:28)
Sure, you know, I, moving into the automotive industry and then eventually the tech industry and the automotive industry, so sort of a double whammy there. I was into very male dominated industries and I climbed the corporate ladder in both. So I survived, I maybe even thrived, but in doing so, there were times when I was

maybe less of certain parts of me. And sometimes that those parts were even the parts that made me like a woman. I mean, not that I ever didn't show up as like my gender. I'm not implying that. And I I'm certainly not implying a he versus she situation. But there are times when you're in a space and you're the only one. And there were many times I sat at boardroom tables or in, you know, meetings with executives and I was

sometimes one of one and sometimes one of very few. And I would say in those environments, I was probably seen as someone who spoke their mind and asked questions, but I can tell you that I wasn't always doing that nearly as much as I would have if I had been in a different environment. And so while that might have been

the persona that people associated with me, it was a diluted version sometimes of that persona. And so there, you know, I was trying to fit myself into spaces and trying to find that balance between pushing forward, climbing up, and not rocking the boat too much, you know, because you're not wanting to be boxed out along the way. And so it's a bit of a balancing act. And then, you know, I think,

in the automotive industry. When I first started, I was doing some marketing as part of business development, and I was able to bring some of that artistic creativity along. But as I moved into the tech space, outside of learning and development, there wasn't a lot of opportunity to bring sort of that aesthetic element into play. And aesthetics is actually one of my like highest scoring values. And so for a whole, you know, six and a half years,

Most of that was put aside. And I didn't really have the energy or the capacity to be creative outside of work. I was tired. I was giving a lot of what I had to my work. And then I also have a family and I'm often putting people before I put myself. And so by the time I gave it all to work and then gave whatever like fumes were left to my family, there wasn't really a whole lot left to do.

anything else with. And so a whole period of my life, I just kind of put that part of me to the side. I mean, you know, it existed there, it would pop out every now and again, but it wasn't really being like fueled or fed or cultivated. You know, it was sort of sitting a little bit stagnant.

Kasey (15:32)
Mm-hmm. Yeah. I can relate to that as well. And the way that I have made sense of it for myself, it wasn't necessarily a male dominated world, although it has been historically working in academia. The way that I sort of distilled it for myself was when I left. And like you, way burned out was the future of my life. I never want to have to sell myself in order to get to be myself.

ever again. And I think for me that tax came from that feeling. Like before I can speak in a meeting, before I can ask a question, before I can share an idea, I feel like I have to sell you that I'm valuable and worthy of being listened to and heard. Exhausting after decades of that kind of living and I, for me, I won't put this on you, didn't even realize.

that I was in that survival mode for all of those years of my career. It comes at a cost. What did you find when you finally got free from those boxes? And how did you recover?

Heather Pridemore (16:41)
Well, I take it a step back, Casey, because I think part of it is, you know, someone asked once, you know, what are you running from? Because it was all about, you know, moving forward and moving up as quickly as possible. And growing up blue collar, I carried that

sort of scarcity mindset with me through most of my career. And honestly, still, it's still there. I spent a good portion of my career often waiting for the other shoe to drop. And I think that's where we start talking about things like imposter syndrome and feelings of worthiness and value. But at the end of the day, I wasn't trying to outdo

anyone else, I was trying to outdo me. So if I leveled up, then it's like, okay, well, what do I do now to level to the next level? Right. So, um, as an example, I was awarded a 40 under 40 award, uh, while I was in the tech space and the automotive industry. And after I got that, I was like, you know, what do I do to top 40 under 40? Like what comes after 40 under 40? I'm, I'm a VP.

I report to the C-suite, I was awarded 40 under 40. What do I do to top that? And so it was always this desire to keep leveling up, but not because I was, you know, it wasn't really an ego thing. I mean, maybe a little bit, but I think there was also this thing is it wasn't so much just what I was running from, which was the scarcity, but it was also what I was running to, which was the freedom.

I thought that if I worked hard enough and I ran fast enough and I could go quick enough through all the levels that I would get to a place where I could leave it all behind and just be free, be myself, you know, kind of get back to that unified holistic version of me somewhere in the distant future. And so that was really the mindset I was carrying through a good portion of my career development.

Kasey (18:38)
Yeah.

Heather Pridemore (18:54)
And then like many, there was a lot of restructuring, you know, in the last couple of years. And the company I was working at, they restructured and I was impacted. And I was honestly, it was one of those situations where if they hadn't made that decision for me, I needed to make it. I was so burnt out. I was, I was like mildly depressed at that point from the burnout. And...

but I was standing at the bottom of a hole and instead of thinking I should probably get out of this hole, I thought, well, I can still see the light at the end of the hole. So, you know, there's hope. And as I came out of that experience and kind of regrouped, you know, I didn't have a plan. I took some time just to recover and I am thankful that I had the

ability to do that. I know that's not always the case for folks who are impacted by layoffs and restructures. But I did have the sort of privilege to take some time. And I remember the first bits of healing were physical. I couldn't regulate my body temperature for a couple of weeks. Like I would run hot, I'd run cold. It's like I was going through menopause or something, except it was all like sort of stress sort of just seeping out of my physical being. And then after that passed,

um, some soul searching. And I did a lot of that through reading and talking and thinking. And, um, I took a trip with my best friend. We went out of town for a week and then, um, my husband actually had a trip and we were on that trip. And I think that's when I started really feeling like myself again, but there was this one moment I want to tell you about, I, we were at the beach in, in California on this trip with my husband.

and I had gone for a walk and I'm still in that sort of reflective state. And I'm walking along the beach and I'm thinking, these rocks are so colorful. Like these rocks look like gemstones on the beach. And so there was this moment, this weekend really of all these experiences that felt so much richer. I mean, they were so abstract from my, my existence up to that point for the last many years.

that I, I mean, I might've thought I was on like hallucinogenics, you know, I was like having this sort of like experience where I was like, this just doesn't seem real. And I went back to the hotel and I said, you guys have to come and look at these rocks on the beach. Like they're so beautiful. And, and that was really, I mean, it's such a, a simple story of just walking down the beach, but that experience hit me really deep. And that was the turning point, I think, in like kind of coming,

like back together, like, you know, this magical point where like, everything kind of just shifted back into like alignment.

Kasey (21:49)
Yeah, your value for aesthetics brought you back to life. Right there on the beach, it showed you the rocks. Yeah.

Heather Pridemore (21:54)
Yeah.

Emily (21:54)
Yeah.

And I think that also speaks to the experience of so many people who are somewhere that they don't want to be. And it can be in, you know, any kind of toxic environment or environment where you're not seen or heard. And that can be work related. It can be in a family and many different types of settings. But then you went from surviving just like I'm in the bottom of this black hole and I can see the light and like, okay, I'm going to stay here.

to being forced out of the black hole and then literally seeing color. And I just, I wanna emphasize that because when, I think it's true for all of us that when we are somewhere really hard, we think that that's where we have to be. We just have to kind of keep digging through like with our fingernails. And the reality is there are possibilities out there that we all have options.

We just don't know what they are or they might not be, you know, in our immediate future, but there are other ways to look at things. One of the things about you that I think is really cool is that self-advocacy is a big part of your history. And I know you've also said that as a creative, it can be hard to bet on yourself. Can you tell us a little bit about how self-advocacy and then also betting on yourself?

has showed up in your life.

Heather Pridemore (23:21)
Yeah, I mean, when you say it, Emily, it almost sounds like how can, how can she say that she believes in self advocacy and then say it's hard to bet on herself. But I think the differences is when I've self advocated, it's often been when I've been within the structure or framework of something else, right. So an example I recently shared on my own podcast was that in high school,

I needed to get scholarships to go to college, right? Growing up blue collar, we didn't have a lot of money for school. And I had been put in this remedial science class, but I needed to be in the advanced science class if I wanted to have the bump to my GPA and if I wanted it to help me with my scholarship. And all of my other classes were like honors or dual enrollment. And I got this one remedial science course. So I wrote letters to all of the faculty, the principals, vice principals, all the folks up in the office.

a petitioning for my schedule to get changed and to be put into this advanced science course. And so, you know, but that was within the bureaucratic system where I had to appeal to someone else and say, please do this thing, you know, and, and I knew I've always known how to navigate those types of environments. It's probably why I did so well, even in these male dominated industries.

to sort of climb the corporate ladder. I can work within the frameworks. I notice the patterns, right? So that part's relatively easy. But what was different about coming out the other side of that journey and deciding I did not wanna go back to a corporate job and deciding I wanted to be an entrepreneur is that I had to bet on myself and it wasn't just the betting on myself. It was all that risk I was taking on that was also gonna impact my family.

because it's very, you know, I told a story before we started recording about being in a situation where I recognize the fact that I've gone a good portion of my life, where I didn't feel like anyone was choosing me and realizing that I wasn't choosing myself either. And so deciding to be an entrepreneur was this really pivotal moment in my life, in my decision-making.

in the valuing of myself where I thought, there's something that you really want and you're gonna make this choice and it's gonna risk everything else. And so that was a much different type of self advocacy than what I had done historically because there was no safety net, there was no framework, there was no predetermined path.

I was just gonna have to figure it out. And I didn't have any toolkit for that because I had never bet on myself before. I had just self-advocated within existing frameworks. And so I didn't have any proof or historical evidence about what was gonna happen when I took that next step.

Emily (26:25)
Wow. Yeah. And it is, yeah, that's such courage. The way that we show up and the way we see ourselves in different settings is so different too. I was at a women's retreat a couple of years ago. I was as a participant. And one of the final activities we did was to write something on a paper that we really wanted to release. And every single woman there.

Kasey (26:26)
Courage.

Emily (26:53)
wrote down something related to feeling like I'm unworthy or I'm not enough or I wish that I could let go of other people's expectations, some version of that. And I think we tend to look at other people and go, okay, they have it figured out. And I'll tell you what, the women at that retreat, I was surrounded by women that I was like, they are powerful and have it together. And then I was like...

they feel the way I do and that we all feel that way. It truly is the human experience. Thank you for sharing that because I think that hearing your bio, people would go, oh, Heather has it all together. She has it all figured out, but we're all figuring it out all the time in different ways, in different settings.

Kasey (27:23)
Mm-hmm.

For sure, figuring it out as we go, not having it figured before we go, that needs to be punctuated. Heather, I'm curious and I'm going to, shamelessly, I'm going to ask a personal thing here. So you're on this edge of I'm going all in on myself. Never have I ever chosen me. Never have I ever taken the big gamble on me. And I'm going.

Emily (27:48)
Yeah.

Kasey (28:07)
I'm going to take the leap and trust my wings will be ready and that it's time for me to fly. Did you fail?

Heather Pridemore (28:13)
ask me later. I mean, the reality is we're still in process, you know? I, you know, the word fail is such an interesting concept to me because I think there are very few things that we actually fail at in life. To me, it's really all about learning. And one thing I think I'm pretty good at is being willing to pivot when things don't, when the experiment doesn't go according to plan.

Emily (28:16)
I'm going to go to bed.

Kasey (28:16)
I'm sorry.

Heather Pridemore (28:40)
That said, I'm also a perfectionist. And so imagine what a mind mess that is when, you know, you want everything to be perfect and you have this very vivid imagination about how it's supposed to be, and you can kind of see it all coming together, but at the same time, when things don't go the way they're supposed to, then you kind of move on from it. So I would say that part of the process is still in process, but it's going well. I mean,

Kasey (29:07)
Yeah.

Heather Pridemore (29:09)
You know, the coaching practice, you know, starting a coaching practice was a much slower process than I had anticipated. So in my mind, you know, those years of experience and that work history and the fact that I'd been in leadership should have been enough. And I got a coaching certificate to add some credentials. I have an MBA that I just finished in December of last year. And so I had all these outward markers of success.

And I thought, well, these are the things I would be looking for if I were looking for a coach right now. And so that's all I need. Right. And so that process was a little slower going than I expected, but I learned in, in sort of the, you know, the fact that it didn't go according to plan that I didn't do a great job earlier in my career of building my professional and personal brand. Um,

People in the industry know me, knew me. You know, I had good connections and a good relationship within the automotive and tech space, but I hadn't done much networking. I hadn't done much thought leadership. And interestingly enough, some of these things are things I actually do care about. I just hadn't put any extra effort into those things because I thought, well, you know, I have a great job. I have all the markers of success. I don't need to do all of that extra stuff. And then I...

come out the other side of that experience and I'm like, crap, I don't have any sort of outward identity. If you didn't know me, you don't know me. I haven't done anything to help people understand who I am. And so a big part of launching my coaching practice has really been trying to build that trust, build that connection and for people to know who I am and not in like a

Kasey (30:44)
Hmm.

Heather Pridemore (31:02)
like a get famous kind of way, but just enough to want to work with me and to know me. And I've met a lot of really interesting folks along the way.

Emily (31:13)
Yeah, there is that no like trust factor in marketing that people, especially when you are providing a service, you are the product and people will see you and go, okay, interesting. And they see you again and they see you again and they see you again. And over time, they're like, okay, I feel like I know her. I like her. And then they trust you. And that's when they hire you. And I know you recently made a comment that there was someone maybe a year ago who you talked to and

Kasey (31:13)
Yeah.

Emily (31:42)
they just now are hiring you or just hired you, right?

Heather Pridemore (31:46)
Yeah, yeah, it's a it's been a year. So I mean, it takes time for people to feel comfortable. And I mean, let's be honest, coaching is a bit of a luxury to you know, it probably shouldn't be it should be something that companies help provide resources for and you know, people have access to because

we're not necessarily getting a lot of career development within our careers. And so coaching should be something that is a provided service and a resource available to more folks. But it is a luxury. And so not only do I have to know like trust, but then I also have to be able to find people who are willing to make that investment in themselves, who are able to make that investment in themselves. And so, you know, it's been different than I would have expected.

coming into it. I mean, I hired a coach, but again, I was in the position of, I had the resources, I was willing to make the investment and I had a referral. So it was sort of the no like trust by association, you know? And so I just didn't go into it with enough thought about folks who were maybe coming from a different perspective than I was at the time.

Kasey (33:01)
Mm.

Emily (33:01)
Yeah, yeah. You know.

Kasey (33:03)
All available for the lesson, right? And to deepen yourself and the relationship and the network and all of those things. I love what you just said. I just wanna highlight it for myself and others. I asked you, did you fail? And your answer was, when an experiment didn't go as planned, I became great at pivoting.

That is such a rich line full of information. Yeah.

Emily (33:28)
Yeah. And that speaks to the way that we talk to ourselves. Our self-talk really does influence how we show up in the world. Because we are going to have experiments that don't go as planned. It is like a big ol' science experiment that we're all doing. And if, you know, in science, if they hypothesize that something is going to work a certain way and then it doesn't, they don't just go, oh, well, okay, we quit.

Kasey (33:33)
Yeah.

Yeah.

Emily (33:56)
I'm a terrible scientist. It really is like, okay, well then how do we go about this? What's our new hypothesis? And I think that's what you're doing. One of the things that I love about you is that you're an avid reader. What are you reading right now?

Kasey (33:57)
Yeah.

Heather Pridemore (34:08)
I'm actually reading two different books. I just started a book and I can't remember the title of it off the top of my head, but it's about a private investigator and it's nonfiction. So far what I've read reads like fiction. It's very narrative. So that's sort of my before bed book. Then I also am reading, Fylla Davis wrote a book about her life. So I'm also in the midst of reading that.

Kasey (34:31)
Finding the...

Heather Pridemore (34:35)
not as interesting books I'm reading. They're interesting to me because they tie to my new business venture, but probably not as interesting to the folks who are listening to this podcast. So just doing some industry research and trying to learn more.

Emily (34:50)
Are you always reading multiple books at one time?

Heather Pridemore (34:53)
Yeah, my husband always, he's like, I don't know how you do that. Cause I, I will read usually multiple books at the same time. And it's partly due to my mood. So it's like, if I've had a really heavy, let's say research day, I'm probably not going to want to read like self-help or professional development or maybe even nonfiction, I'm sorry, yeah, nonfiction. But, um, if I have something of interest, I may pivot into a new book.

because I'm like, well, right now I need this bit of information and I'll come back to this other book later because it's not as pressing. And then the fiction books are really just like a palette cleanser, you know, sometimes your mind just needs a break and I like to read it. I like to always have something to read, but it's important to me that I also sometimes give my brain just like a break.

Kasey (35:40)
Rest.

Emily (35:40)
Cool. So what does it look like if someone hires you as a coach? What does the process look like? Or is there a process?

Heather Pridemore (35:49)
There's a, we'll call it a framework. I find some coaches have these really rigid programs. And so you sign up and it's like step one, step two, step three. I am not set up that way. I start every relationship with a discovery call. I've had discovery calls where at the end I said, look, I would love to help you, but I'm not the person that you need. And if I know the people who they need, I may refer them to some other folks, but you know, I...

I may not be the person to solve what it is that they're trying to solve. And so that's part of it is like, are we a good fit from like the solution that you're trying to accomplish? And then there should also be some personal connection, right? Like do we vibe? I mean, it's such an abstract thing, but it is important in a coaching relationship that there is some sort of mutual connection. And then once I understand what it is that they're trying to accomplish, that's where we can really start to put some structure.

around the relationship. So I do all of my coaching engagements as a 12 session package. But within that package, it could be three, six, three, six or 12 months. And everybody does a Hogan assessment is like the foundation of the relationship. So that just gives us some common understanding, some baseline information that we both are sort of working from. And then from there, it's going to just be catered to what they need. So I mean, if someone's looking for a job, we're gonna be

going over their resume, we're gonna kind of review all their assets, their personal and professional branding, talking about interview preparation and doing some mock interviews. But someone else might say, they might be in a position like I was, where they're like, I'm really burnt out and I'm having a really hard time navigating the situation. And for those folks, it's gonna be a very different structure, a very different dialogue. I worked with someone last year who, partway through our sessions together, quit their job.

They were in kind of a toxic environment and I didn't say quit your job. We never actually even really talked about them quitting their job, but through our dialogue they came to the conclusion it wasn't the right fit for them anymore and they did leave that position. So you just never know what's going to happen.

Kasey (37:47)
Mm-hmm.

Emily (38:02)
Wow, cool.

Kasey (38:03)
might one of our listeners want to choose you as their coach?

Heather Pridemore (38:06)
I think what I want to emphasize is that I think everyone's story is really important. So that's often what I'm trying to understand. It's not just about this moment that you're in right now because coaching is often triggered by some sort of event, right? You got passed over for promotion, you've been laid off, you got a new toxic boss. There's some sort of triggering event. And so when we're in that kind of headspace...

we're often just thinking about this sort of narrow view, but things from our past very much impact the choices we make in life. And so for me, for example, growing up blue collar, I saw my family work really hard and they had to go to work because as we talked about earlier, at the time I didn't realize it, but it was about survival. But all I did was internalize that hard work. And so then when I was in a corporate setting,

Kasey (38:55)
Yeah.

Heather Pridemore (39:02)
I was also working really hard. And I wasn't necessarily always having thoughts about the level of effort or whether or not I should be doing something different because all I had ever seen was just you go to work, you get up every day, it doesn't matter how you feel, it doesn't matter whether you like your job, like you just get up and you go to work. And right, exactly. So.

Kasey (39:26)
Ignore all of that, get back to work. Exactly.

Heather Pridemore (39:31)
when you think about the influence of your history, and that starts to play a big part in the stories that you tell yourself about your work and the stories that you tell yourself about yourself. And so all those things are really important in coaching. And so I think story is so important, and I'm just not sure that all coaches are gonna want that element there.

but I don't think I would be a good coach without that element of story.

Kasey (40:02)
Absolutely. Yeah. Yeah, we are our stories. The story of each of our lives is the most unique thing about each of us. And then I feel, also as a coach, that the disruption can occur in between the soul of the person and the story that they're carrying. Like, that's the crevice that we seek to slide ourselves into to help them maybe create something different.

with both their past, their present, and their future. Yeah, how cool. I wanna work with you.

Emily (40:37)
Well, I know we're going to have all of your information in our show notes, but what is the best way that someone could get in touch with you?

Heather Pridemore (40:44)
If someone is interested in exploring coaching, the best way is to visit my website, prid There is a free discovery call there so they could just fill that out, pick a time, we could have a chat. It really is just a chat. There's no sales pitch or anything. It's really just trying to understand what that person is interested in accomplishing and seeing if we're a good match for each other.

Emily (41:09)
awesome.

Kasey (41:10)
Heather, can I ask one more question? If we end today and disconnect and you haven't gotten to say fill in the blank, you'll really regret it. What is that?

Heather Pridemore (41:12)
Please.

Oh gosh, um...

I think the thing that's really been floating around in my head lately is about healthy resilience. And so, so much of my story, my history has just been about resilience because I had to, because it's what I knew. You know, it was what I saw growing up.

And now I feel like I'm in this different place where while I was always very capable and competent, there was always an underlying uncertainty and maybe lack of confidence at times. And now everything is uncertain and I feel more confident than I have been in a really long time. And it's...

It's surprising. It's hard to explain, but it all comes back to this idea of healthy resilience and, you know, thriving on your own terms, owning your story, which I say on my podcast, it's time to own your story. Are you ready? And I'm ready to own my story and to, you know, thrive in a way that isn't, because I'm such a strong workhorse.

but more because I'm unified and whole and in alignment with my values.

Kasey (42:49)
Yeah. Amen, sister. Let freedom reign. I said to a girlfriend last night I was out to dinner with, and we went to see the Michael Jackson show at the Buell, which was amazing, by the way. She said, you know, I know a bunch of things have stirred up and changed in your life in the last few months. Like, what do you think is going to happen? Or what do you want? What do you hope is next? And I said, I don't have any idea.

Emily (42:51)
Yeah, that's beautiful.

Kasey (43:12)
And I think that means that I'm healing. It's like, now that I'm in this land of everything is unclear and uncertain, and I feel really present here, it's like, that's freedom. Little did I know it had been available to me the whole time. I just needed some, you know, wires to get uncrossed. Welcome to the land of freedom, woman.

Emily (43:14)
Mm-hmm. Yeah.

Yeah.

Kasey (43:35)
Yeah, it's good to be here.

Emily (43:36)
That means that freedom comes from a place of not controlling, freedom comes from a place of acceptance. Like this is where I am. And I'm gonna figure it out. Like almost like just the security in yourself to go. I don't know what's next. I don't know all the parts of this whole like picture, but I know I'm okay.

Kasey (43:43)
Yeah.

Yeah, I don't know what's next and I no longer need to know. I've surrendered. And there's something truly freeing from that place when you can just sort of allow life to happen and know that you are the creator of it at the same time. Yeah. Wow.

Heather Pridemore (44:13)
something really interesting I'll share with you, Casey. I learned to swim as an adult, so I didn't learn to swim as a kid. And the thing I hated the most about swim lessons was learning to float, especially the back float, because there is such a level of trust required in yourself, in the water, in the unknown, the things you can't see, and...

Kasey (44:20)
Yeah.

Heather Pridemore (44:41)
That is not how I've lived most of my life, you know? Control was a pretty fundamental part of my journey. And so I always hated to float. But I always think about that, that like idea of floating and the need to trust yourself and that, you know, what you just said about being present. Floating is very much too about being sort of present in the moment and you can't really be anywhere else when you're floating, you kind of have to just be there.

And so there's some interesting metaphorical alignment with the idea of floating.

Kasey (45:18)
Yeah, absolutely. You remind me of one of my favorite quotes. When I stop struggling, I float. It's the law.

We just have to find a way to stop the struggle. Go ahead, Emma. Sorry.

Emily (45:25)
Heather Tell.

And as you stop the struggle, tell everyone this cool thing that you've done in the water after you learned how to swim.

Heather Pridemore (45:39)
Yeah, so it was actually why I learned to swim. I grew up in Florida near Wicky Wachee Springs. And Wicky Wachee Springs is known for the mermaids that have been there since like, I don't know, the 1950s. Elvis has been there seeing the mermaids. Like the mermaids are a big deal. And they do this adult mermaid camp for women 30 and older. And I decided one year that I was gonna go. I was gonna be a mermaid. And I...

enrolled in swimming lessons and I had to take multiple rounds of swimming lessons. I mean, you know, your thoughts about death and everything are a lot stronger when you're not a kid and you're learning to swim. Plus I'd had some experiences under the water, you know, that were not pleasant. And so I carried a lot of fear into that experience, but I learned to swim so that I could go to

health obstacles and then getting back in the water and getting my swimming skills back up to par, I got to go to mermaid camp last August. And so I finally made my dream come true and spent a weekend with the sirens of WikiWatchie and got to swim in such a magical place that so few people get to experience. And it was absolute magic.

Kasey (46:52)
Wow. If you're a mermaid, I'm a mermaid. I want to be a mermaid!

Emily (46:58)
I know. I want to be a mermaid too. Cool. Well, Heather, we're at the end and the question that we like to ask all of our guests is the same. What are you grateful for?

Kasey (47:01)
Yeah!

Heather Pridemore (47:09)
When I think about gratefulness, there's so many things I could list there. But I think what I'm most grateful for in this moment, in this period of my journey, is both that confidence that I talked about after batting on myself, and also that healthy resilience. And they are things that are not only helping me heal,

but they are things that are helping me find success in new ways. And they're also providing me the opportunity to bring the best version of myself home to my family. And so those are the things I'm most grateful for.

Emily (47:53)
Beautiful. Yeah. Well, thank you for joining us today.

Heather Pridemore (47:58)
Thank you for having me.

Kasey (47:59)
So good to spend this time with you. I feel inspired. My heart is full just from having heard your story and hear you speak from your heart. Thank you so much for being with us and sharing yourself with our audience.

Emily (47:59)
All right, Solstead listeners.

Heather Pridemore (48:12)
Thank you.

Emily (48:12)
Yeah. All right, everyone, if you have questions, you want to submit a request for a topic, if you want to be on the podcast, send us an email solsturdpodcast at gmail.com. And we would love to hear from you. And like always, please download, subscribe and share the podcast. It's the best way for anyone to hear about it and to share everything that we are putting out there. Thank you.

Kasey (48:40)
Take great care of yourselves and each other. Be well.